FH Out Front Blog

When a Kiss Is More Than Just a Kiss

I’m a hugger. I come from a large, affectionate family and we all do it – to relatives, friends and beyond. And the ability to be openly affectionate with another guy friend is probably one of my favorite things about our community. Most of us aren’t stifled by sexist rules about masculinity and emotion. I’ve had friends hug me as they spin us around after a long time apart, or grab onto my hand walking down the street, or give me a kiss on the lips goodbye.

Whether friendly or romantic, a kiss shared between two people of any kind makes this emotional hugger smile. But for people in Salt Lake City and El Paso, the simple connection of lips was grounds for being removed from the premises, detained, and charged with trespassing. In El Paso, a couple was kicked out of Chico’s Tacos for locking lips, while in Salt Lake City a couple’s kiss in a formerly public easement sold to the Mormon Church led to their detention and a citation for trespassing and "unwanted behavior." People in both communities protested the event, with couples staging a kiss-in in Utah.

The Musician: Q&A with Dave Koz

Have you ever wondered what it’s like to be famous but not out? What are the career implications once you do come out? What goes through your mind through all of these changes? 

I’m so pleased to be able to share one man’s perspective on these – and other – questions with you. When he came out in The Advocate in 2004, Dave Koz instantly expanded his already large fan base and shattered a lot of myths about gay men and music. As Dave points out in our conversation below, many people assume that gay men only like club music. That’s not true (I, for one, have been a Dave Koz fan for more than a decade). And the idea that the only gay musicians are those that make club music has been forever banished with Dave’s bold action to say who he is fully, as a person and a musician.

I met Dave at the Out for Equality Ball here in Washington during the Presidential Inauguration in January. I walked up to him and introduced myself after his opening set at the Ball (I’ve seen lots of famous people, but never had the nerve to say anything before). What a nice guy Dave Koz is – he greeted my partner Mark and I graciously and even agreed to pose for a picture with us (that’s us in the photo to the left). Fortunately, he also agreed to conduct a Q&A with me for the blog. We’re running it today as a Pride Month special feature in advance of the kick-off of Dave’s Side by Side summer tour (with Brian Culbertson) on Friday, June 26 in Kettering, Ohio.

As I said to Dave in an e-mail after I read his answers to my questions, he is as well spoken with words as he is with music. I hope you enjoy reading Dave’s thoughts as much as I enjoyed the opportunity to talk with him. And if you’d like to know more about Dave, check out his Web site (or set up a Dave Koz channel on Pandora as I’ve done).

Ben Finzel: You came out publicly in an interview in The Advocate. What was that experience like for you? 

Childish Behavior?

In this age of iPods, social media and digital marketing, radio as a communications channel is typically not the first thing that comes to mind. Living in the city and taking public transportation, I’m addicted to my iPod and couldn’t tell you a single Windy City station or show host. Despite my personal urban, digital bubble, radio continues to reach countless captive (read: gridlocked) audiences across the country, usually offering humorous banter and melodic relaxation. 

At times, however, radio hosts can take a dialogue too far, finding serious LGBT issues a source for humor or blatantly harmful comments. The Gay and Lesbian Alliance Against Defamation yesterday released a call to action on the Rob, Arnie & Dawn in the Morning radio show (KRXQ 98.5 FM  in Sacramento, California and KDOT 104.5 FM in Reno, Nevada). I was shocked to read the comments made by hosts Rob Williams and Arnie States on May 28 against transgender or questioning children. The conversation stemmed from a recent story about a transgender child in Omaha, Nebraska and her parents’ decision to support her transition – and spiraled into more than a half hour of defamatory remarks towards children and transgender individuals.

Snap Judgment: What Does the "American Idol" Outcome Mean?

As it does every season, “American Idol” has dominated headlines and online conversations. But, as bloggers at afterelton.com and elsewhere have pointed out, the conversation has been different this year because of the emergence of an “almost openly-gay” finalist. 

Now that finalist has finished second in his quest to become American Idol. Did his perceived sexual orientation have something to do with that finish? If so, what does that mean about the country and about the public’s mood?

As follow-up to yesterday’s Snap Judgment post on “American Idol,” I asked the Out Front Blog team to consider these ideas and then answer the following question:

“What does the outcome of this season’s American Idol mean for gay and lesbian communications?”

Our answers, in alphabetical order by first name, are reprinted below:

Snap Judgment: Does It Matter Who Wins "American Idol?"

Given all of the media attention and online chatter about "American Idol" and the “is he or isn’t he” questions about Adam Lambert’s sexual orientation, we thought we’d take the opportunity today (the day of the season finale) to consider what this national conversation means for gay and lesbian communications (if anything).

So, we’re going to try something new today (and tomorrow). Today, we asked the Out Front Blog team to answer the following question:

“Does it matter who wins American Idol?”

Here’s our take, listed in alphabetical order by first name: 

Kids Say the Darndest Things

"We're all the same people, it's just that we think differently or we were born differently, and these people should be treated the same way as you would treat somebody else."

As an 8-year-old child, I think I was typically more mature and compassionate than others my age. However, those qualities extended as far as sitting next to the lonely kid in the cafeteria or wanting to save the Florida manatees I'd recently seen at Sea World. It pales in comparison to the statement above, spoken by Colorado third-grader, Ethan, who organized and held an equal rights rally on the steps of the Denver capitol this weekend.

The young student was moved to action many grown adults shy away from these days after discovering a neighborhood child whose two moms are unable to get married in Colorado. Ethan spoke to local officials, lined up permits and speakers, and even handled his own marketing -- posting flyers on the event throughout Denver.

His message is simple, which you can hear at our friend Pam Spaulding's blog Pam's House Blend: "People should be treated the same and they should have equal mariiage rights and equal protection." His example, though, is more profound. Without words, Ethan's belief in America's protection of equal rights and freedom speech, coupled with his determination that one person -- no matter their age -- can bring about needed change, sends a compelling message to parties on both sides of the controversial issue.

Check out the video of his speech from the rally after the jump.

First, Do No Harm

We’re not doctors, but we communications professionals often follow the adage commonly associated with medicine in our advice to clients: “first, do no harm.” The concept is that we should not plan or conduct communications efforts that cause harm to our clients’ reputation, image or products. If it sounds like common sense, it is.  But that doesn’t mean it’s always practiced in the real world.

I bring this up today because The Advocate ran a story online Sunday about Walmart’s CEO and the 2008 Arkansas amendment to ban adoption and foster parenting by LGBT couples. According to the article, Walmart’s new CEO, Mike Duke, signed a petition last year to put the amendment on the Arkansas ballot (it was placed on the ballot and passed by a large margin in November of 2008).

Communications and marketing, as with politics, is a game of addition. The objective of most communications and marketing efforts is to add more people, not drive them away. Increasingly, efforts that drive away LGBT customers are being seen by consumers as problematic, even for companies that might not seem all that interested in reaching our community. More and more companies are beginning to understand that it’s just not good business to openly discriminate. Not just because our community is offended, but because in ever-larger numbers consumers value companies that value all people equally. 

You could make the argument that Walmart’s CEO was simply expressing his opinion and say that he had every right to do so (and note that he wasn’t CEO when he signed the petition as he just took on that job in February of this year). But consumers also have the right to shop where they feel welcome, wanted and respected. And they are expressing that right more and more by supporting those companies that support them and their neighbors – even the LGBT ones.

Walmart’s CEO is entitled to his opinion. But the consumers he wants to continue adding to his customer base are also entitled to show their displeasure at his exclusionary beliefs by exercising their right to shop elsewhere.

We’ll see if this development has any measurable impact on Walmart’s sales. Despite past support for LGBT organizations and issues, Walmart has been inconsistent in its engagement with our community.  And previous missteps by the company on LGBT issues received scant attention – even in the LGBT blogosphere – and it may be that this is another one-day story. However, if I were advising Walmart (I’m not), I’d tell them to take these kinds of situations seriously.

Walmart has apparently spent a great deal of time and resources to reshape its reputation and build a positive record on sustainability and environmental concerns (no doubt to move beyond their negative “big box” image of the past). They had previously begun attempting to do that with the LGBT community as well, but this latest news adds to the pattern of inconsistency about where Walmart stands on LGBT issues. Continued confusion could cause harm to Walmart's efforts to build a corporate image of responsibility and responsiveness. That may not happen today, with this story, but a continual pattern of these actions will add up over time. It takes a long time to build a reputation, but a very short time to damage one.

Rallying Support in Today's Networked, Tech World

It's not often that I feel out of the loop on LGBT events and issues, as I'm addicted to my RSS feed and LGBT TweetDeck column that includes most of the leading bloggers and news sites. However, it was this past Friday afternoon I heard from a friend -- in person -- about this past weekend's national gay rights rally in Philadelphia.

The National Equality Rally brought together hundreds of LGBT individuals who marched the streets of historic Philly with signs and speeches addressing current issues, such as marriage equality, adoption rights, AIDS research funding, discrimination in the workplace, health care, and the Don't Ask, Don't Tell policy. The event, which was considered the first national demonstration since 2000, garnered an AP wire story that ran on the sites and pages of many papers across the country and LGBT media coverage.

Reviewing the coverage and online buzz about the event, I wonder if marches and public demonstrations such as Sunday's rally work well in today's tech-driven, hyper-networked world. Have we moved to a point of one-to-one online networking and personal interaction that large advocacy events are little more than replications of historic communication methods with decreasing effectiveness? Personally, I think these demonstrations can still be effective, if used correctly within an integrated communications effort, and are woven into the eternal DNA of Americans.

Marriage Matters

Wedding season is upon us. Formal invitations, matching earlier save-the-dates, have recently flooded my mailbox and I’m busily writing toasts, selecting gifts, and booking flights for my best friend’s and little brother’s summer nuptials. Add to that the growing mainstream and LGBT news media coverage on same-sex marriage, and recent movement in the legislatures of Iowa, Vermont, New Hampshire, Maine, Washington D.C. and New York, and I can’t stop thinking – or talking – about marriage. [Check out Laura’s post that looks at the online buzz on same-sex marriage.]

Both of the big weddings I’m in and looking forward to are in Kentucky and Florida, two states banning same-sex marriage. As the hopeless romantic still believing in a happy family of my own one day, I have recently focused on how to communicate the importance of marriage equality in my daily interactions, and in between the cake cutting and bouquet tossing this summer (if the topic is raised).

Overlooked in the Miss USA Flap

By now, you’ve likely heard or read about the latest example of the way the conversation about equal marriage rights has become part of the national dialogue. This weekend, blogger Perez Hilton asked Miss California USA (one of the top five contestants in the Miss USA pageant) her views on gay marriage. Miss California’s answer – that she believes “marriage should be between a man and a woman” – sparked a media firestorm that likely gave the Miss USA Pageant more media attention than it ever would have earned otherwise (I wasn’t even aware the pageant was taking place prior to this incident). 

Hilton’s response to Miss California's answer and his follow-up to that response sparked equally intense coverage and disappointment, outrage and commentary from every corner – including in the gay community.

But almost overlooked in this story is the reaction of the Miss California USA organization. As the Christian Science Monitor put it in their story on Monday, “The directors of the Miss California pageant condemned her answer on Monday morning.” Here’s the detail from the story:

Silence is Golden

In America, things are rarely quiet. We’re known for the noise, the buzz and bustle, the constant communications in the media, government, businesses and our personal lives that crescendos exponentially every second. And it’s all in the name of progress, right?

Silence, though unsettling to some of today’s hyper-networked individuals, can be just as or even more powerful than the loudest, most eloquent proclamations. It gives pause to those constantly chattering or “tweeting,” while allowing those being silent time for greater reflection and listening, two essential communication elements largely overlooked today.

Tomorrow on April 17, the National Day of Silence will be taking place in schools across the country. Coordinated by the Gay, Lesbian and Straight Education Network, students are encouraged to participate in a vow of silence to raise awareness of LGBT harassment and bullying daily faced by students, teachers and school staff. Since the program started, more than 500,000 students from nearly 6,500 junior high and high schools in all 50 states and Puerto Rico have participated.

If You Don't Get It, You Don't Get It

I suppose it’s easy for some commentators in our community to get caught up in the excitement about the recent advances in marriage in Iowa and Vermont. These were momentous and wonderful decisions to be sure. And they follow a steady drumbeat of positive change at state and local levels. But they also follow a seemingly never-ending chain of negative news that highlights the need for long-term communications and outreach on any number of LGBT issues. Witness Bryan’s post yesterday about the 11-year old boy who killed himself to escape anti-gay taunting. Or Laura's post last spring about anti-gay violence. Or any number of newspaper stories about harassment, threats and even murder of LGBT people across the country.

We may have “won” a few battles, but there’s still a war going on in many places. And we still need communicators and community advocates fighting to ensure that this "war" ends peacefully and soon. Unfortunately, we're not yet at the day when all LGBT people can live, work and be who they are safely and without fear. And as we discuss frequently here, we need to keep the dialogue going if we ever want to get to that point.

So why then would The Washington Post run an op-ed on Sunday railing against the “bloated” LGBT organizations filled with staff who are apparently unable to “move out of a mindset that sees the plight of gay people as one of perpetual struggle.”  Wow. The piece, written by an assistant editor for a well-known national magazine, goes on to assert that all of the changes in the cultural landscape mean that one day “civil rights groups will no longer be necessary.” That’s a valid point, and I hope it is true one day, but making that point now (and in the smug way he did) ignores the reality of the world we live in today and minimizes the importance of the many voices talking with many people to bring that goal to fruition. There are many positive things to say about the current LGBT landscape, but ignoring the negative aspects is akin to wearing blinders while crossing the street.

It's really important to remember that we're not all well-off, white, gay men living in cosmopolitan urban centers. Our community is incredibly diverse. Some of us are less than well-off (particularly in this economy). Others are people of color. Others are lesbian or bisexual or transgender. Others live in suburban or rural areas. Yes, we are everywhere, but it's not always "acceptable" for all of us to live openly everywhere. It may seem that the conversation can stop in some areas because so much good has been accomplished, but it's important to remember that in many places the conversation has only just begun.

We could - and should - argue about the need for LGBT organizations to change their strategies and adjust to the new realities of communication and outreach. We’ve talked about that quite a bit on this blog in the past several months. But the solution to a communcations problem is not to stop communicating, it's to start communicating differently. I agree that many of our communications strategies need to change. I agree that there is room for improvement - and a need for new voices. But I don’t agree that gay and lesbian communications is now - or soon will be - unnecessary because society is so “accepting” of LGBT people. 

For every marriage victory, we should remember that LGBT people are denied more than 1,000 federal rights granted to legally married people by the federal government. For every company that scores a 100 on the HRC Corporate Equality Index, we should acknowledge that the largest employer in the United States openly discriminates against LGBT people. For every positive LGBT storyline in popular entertainment, we should recognize that news outlets, advertisements and popular entertainment regularly impugn, attack and/or make fun of LGBT people simply for being who they are. For every proud out gay man or woman, we must not forget that there are children who feel the tug of shame and decide to kill themselves because they’re so scared to be called “gay.” 

For all of the great work that has been done, there is much more great work still to be done. And we need to, in the words of a spiritual, “lift every voice and sing” to bring that work into the light of day. We need all of our allies, our advocates and our supporters to keep the conversation going. If you think otherwise, you’re just not seeing the real world. 

This op-ed reminds me of one of the previous promotional campaigns for The Washington Post: “if you don’t get, you don’t get it.” 

Indeed.

Out's Power 50 List is Out...What About the Nominees?

Out has published their annual “Power 50” list again this year and true to form, the list is stirring up controversy again. Barney Frank is #1, which I suppose isn’t too surprising given the lead role he has had in much of the national conversations about the financial meltdown. There are other expected nominations – Ellen Degeneres, Rosie O’Donnell, Neil Patrick Harris. It's an interesting list and I enjoyed reading it. You could certainly contest the relative placement of this or that person or the omission of this well-known figure or famous actor. But what has generated the most interest so far is the inclusion of well-known figures who aren’t actually…out. 

I have to admit that I didn’t initially think of it this way, but Jeremy Hooper at Good As You and others have made the very valid point that a list purporting to identify the leading “out” influencers ought to list people who are actually out. Set aside (for a moment) the notion that they are allegedly gay and should be out, etc. and focus on the idea that if you’re not actually out you should not be listed as one of the most powerful “out” people. That makes perfect sense to me. 

We could argue (and have) about the merits of coming out and the importance of well-known news and entertainment figures being honest about their sexuality, but that’s not the point here. If you’re not out, you’re not a powerful out person. Out should use this list to actually honor those who are powerful because they are out, not in spite of the fact that they are not.

Recovering from Homophobia

This past Friday's decision by the Iowa Supreme Court to give the state's LGBT couples greater equality and happiness was another step in the global fight against homophobia that stifles, burdens and harms the lives of thousands. An irrational fear of or contempt for our community, homophobia has had some significant play recently in mainstream and LGBT media, besides the arguments of opposition in marriage legislation or judicial hearings.

Last Monday, the European Union released a report on the damage persistent widespread homophobia has had on European gays and lesbians. EDGE publications also released a story on the devastating effects homophobia can have on our hetero colleagues, as two Brooklyn straight men were recently harassed and battered after they were assumed gay as they walked home during a cold evening huddled close for warmth.

The Values Proposition: More Q&A with Mitchell Gold

Today we present the conclusion of our two part Q&A with businessman and LGBT visionary Mitchell Gold. In this part of our conversation, Mitchell talks about his book, CRISIS, and about the importance of being out in business. For more on Mitchell, check out his company’s Web site.

Ben Finzel: We’ve talked a bit on this blog about CRISIS, your groundbreaking book of 40 essays by famous people recounting the price they paid for society’s homophobia. When I met you last year, you told me the book was the most important thing you’ve ever done. Tell us a bit about the book and why it is so important.

Mitchell Gold: First, it is 30 essays of a diverse group of very well known to fairly well known and accomplished people. There are also ten essays from not particularly well known young people under 23 years old. I wanted to make sure to have young people because I know there is a misconception by some that everything is getting better and easier. That might be true for some, but for the vast majority it really isn’t.

CRISIS is important because it gives the LGBT civil rights movement an effective and previously unused way to communicate why full and equal rights are so important to our community. Over the past 4 years I’ve learned that many well meaning people just don’t know the horrible harm that is caused to gay teenagers. Their vote, their church, their family and friends could be causing this harm and if they don’t know about it in the clearest of terms they will never know it and be able to do something about it. We always look for a silver bullet message to get people to change and this is it. This book is transformational. Let me share two true stories:

1) A few days ago I was in Puerto Rico having dinner with a customer who is about 45 years old, a Republican delegate for John McCain, Catholic and recently the father of twin boys. I gave him a copy of CRISIS last October after a dinner where I learned he was a delegate and supporter of McCain with the inscription “May Alfredo and Alberto grow up crisis free.”  As I gave him the book I told him John McCain would be devastating for gay kids in the future because of the potential Supreme Court appointees and the general climate of rejection he would allow….especially with Sarah Palin and her fundamentalist Christian views. I asked him to read the book before the election and think about what kind of world he wants his kids to grow up in…regardless of what their sexual orientation happens to be. 

At our dinner a few days ago he told me he was touched by the inscription and did read the book before the election and consequently changed his position. Even more interesting he told me that he showed his 81 year old mother the book and read from the chapters about Catholics. After some discussion he told me she has now totally changed her views on gay people.

2) In a few weeks there will be an article published in a well known mainstream Christian publication by a well known Evangelical Christian minister and professor of ethics. I can’t disclose much from the article yet but here are a couple of quick quotes:

“Crisis tells the sad stories of dozens of young people….. How often they have been left broken by their fundamental rejection as human beings—at the hands of Christians, and in the name of the Bible.”

“Obviously we must extend such basic acceptance, such human and Christian love.”

“But after reading these stories, it seems to me that Christians have something to request from God, and from the gays and lesbians among us. We need forgiveness.”  

Ben Finzel: We frequently blog about the importance of public figures coming out and sharing the realities of their lives – our lives – with society at large. We’re making some progress in this regard with more people coming out, but there are still some fields, including business, where out leaders are few and far between. Do you wish more business leaders would come out? What do you think it will take for that to happen?

Mitchell Gold: Yes, of course every business leader has to come out. And then they have to do a great job.

We have to have a society where being gay is just simply a normal part of a human’s being and life. It has to stop being such a big deal. And that will happen when fundamentalist anti-gay religious groups stop trying to put themselves in superior positions to others, stop being judgmental, and stop interpreting their sacred books to doing these things.

A big part of this responsibility lies within our own community. Our organizations have to teach the simple truths about our lives, that sexual orientation is not some promiscuous choice, but rather a wonderful natural part of our creation. And we have to remind people that people have been hurt in the name of religious beliefs before and it is wicked. June 20, 1995 is the date that the Southern Baptist Convention issued a formal apology to Black Americans for the Southern Baptist Convention’s role in supporting the horrors of slavery and segregation. Let’s all join together in commending the SBC for recognizing their past mistake with a wink to think about the ones they do today.

Ben Finzel: Mitchell, thanks again for your willingness to share your thoughts with us. I think you’ve made the value proposition of being out, honest and direct very clear. And I think you’ve given us all a path to follow as we consider our own actions and perceptions. Here’s to many more years of success.

The Values Proposition: Q&A with Mitchell Gold

We’ve now conducted Q&As with about 30 people in the two and half year history of the Out Front Blog. I have many favorites among them – Billie Jean King was a real highlight – and this one will definitely join that list as an outstanding example of clear, decisive leadership and vision both for business and the future of our community.

Today, we’re starting a two part Q&A with Mitchell Gold, eponymous founder of Mitchell Gold + Bob Williams. For the uninitiated, Mitchell’s company makes stylish, sustainable, fabulous furniture. We’re fortunate to have a Mitchell Gold + Bob Williams store in D.C. and I love shopping there.

But Mitchell Gold is more than a furniture impresario. He’s a business leader, author and community activist. And his community is more than just his home in North Carolina (although he’s active there as well) – it’s the LGBT community across the country. Mitchell is active in a number of organizations and frequently participates in LGBT events in cities across the country. It was at one of those events that I met him last year – the National Gay and Lesbian Journalists Association (NLGJA) holiday party in Washington. Ever gracious, Mitchell not only stopped to talk with my partner and me at the party, but remembered me when I followed up with an e mail to ask him to conduct this Q&A with us.

Mitchell will be back in D.C. this week to accept a lifetime achievement award from PEN – the local LGBT chamber of commerce. It’s a richly deserved honor. Take a look at our conversation today about consumer loyalty and business values and you’ll see why. And come back tomorrow for the conclusion of our conversation along with a little breaking news from Mitchell that may make you want to run right out and buy a copy of his book, CRISIS (if you haven’t already).

Ben Finzel: We often blog about the importance of loyalty to our community by marketers seeking to reach our community. The premise is that companies that are loyal to us will reap the benefits in loyalty from us, particularly in tough economic times when customer loyalty and brand power can make a difference in economic performance. How important do you think that is now, given the dire state of our economy? 

Love Who You Love

Despite attending most of high school and college in Texas, my knowledge of country music is limited to Dolly Parton, The Dixie Chicks, Garth Brooks and Wynonna. I know the names of many of the big country acts, but couldn’t name any of their songs or recognize their band members. That is changing today thanks to our friend Jeremy Hooper at goodasyou.org. In a post today, Jeremy recounts an interview Rascal Flatts singer Gary LeVox gave to Country Music Television recently about the band’s new single “Love Who You Love.”

Here’s an excerpt from Jeremy’s post – from the interview on the CMT blog:

We actually have some gay people that work with us, and we have a lot of friends that are gay, too, and I know that this song [“Love Who You Love”] has inspired them,” said [Rascal Flatts] singer Gary LeVox during an interview at CMT earlier this month. “I know that coming out was tough on their parents and on them and the whole entire family. For a long time, some of them didn’t get to hear ‘I love you’ from their dads or be accepted in that way. … It’s helped a lot of our friends.”

“That’s what’s cool about our music,” says guitarist Joe Don Rooney. “You can interpret (it like) that. If you get that — it’s perfect. If you are someone who’s gay or someone who’s straight, you still feel something from the song, and that’s what we want.”

Finding Meaning in "Friending" and "Following"

I have several blog post ideas in the hopper, but nothing that is far enough along to be ready to be finished and posted today. So, this weekend I changed my Facebook status to “seeks inspiration for his Out Front Blog post on Tuesday,” just to see what would happen. The result? A comment from an old friend who is waiting for me to follow up on the Q&A we discussed weeks ago. A comment from a former client who suggested I look at the “Buy Gay” fan page on Facebook. And a reminder that social media is evolving every day.

Social networking is often maligned as “too much” conversation or “unnecessary sharing” that is akin to “virtual pollution.” And some of it is. But among the Twitter updates on what people think of the line at DMV or Facebook comments about the weather are numerous examples of the significant ways in which communication is changing. 

Instead of driving us further apart, I can’t help but wonder if all of this communication isn’t bringing us closer together. Making communications easier – particularly with friends and family in disparate locations – can improve our relationships by ensuring we’re able to engage with people we might not otherwise have time to remain connected to. All of this “following” and “friending” can have a positive outcome: it can help keep us aware of what those we care about are up to and what matters to them. And in the broader sense, particularly when friends of our friends see what we’re talking about, it can help break down some of the misconceptions about who we as LGBT people are and what we care about. 

Yes, it may sound ridiculous to suggest that reading about someone’s thoughts on the line at the grocery store might help improve understanding, but bear with me for a moment. What if by demonstrating how much we have in common, we’re demonstrating the value and worth of each of us as humans and fellow residents of the planet? What if the commonality of our concerns is helping to ease the fear of the unknown that we all know is the root cause of some of the fear, hatred or mistrust of LGBT people?

I’m not suggesting that Twitter is going to save the planet or that Facebook will set us free. But perhaps the continued evolution of how we communicate will, over time, improve the understanding of our differences and help us evolve as humans too. It’s worth a thought. 

For now, I’m going to keep the conversation going – sharing knowledge and perspective should be helpful, at least when it’s combined with the musings of so many others with the same good intentions.

Are you tweeting? Do you follow outfrontblog on Twitter? Are you on Facebook? Are you a member of the Out Front Blog fan group? We invite you to join us in this ongoing conversation and we look forward to hearing from you.

Do You Count?

In December 2008, I read an article on entrepreneur.com called “10 Advertising Words to Avoid in 2009.” The article provided advice to advertisers about the words they shouldn’t use in ad copy. It was a helpful roll call of unnecessary, often meaningless words that tend to be overused in advertisements – my favorites were “synergy” and “drinkability.” 

I saved the article thinking it would be good inspiration to use in writing my own list of “10 words to avoid in LGBT marketing in 2009 or any year.” I haven’t written that list yet, but a post on AMERICAblog yesterday caught my attention and made me think I ought to at least start that conversation again. The post, written by my friend John Aravosis, focuses on the use of one of the words that will certainly be on my list of top 10 words to avoid: “lifestyle.” 

A U.S. Census spokesperson was quoted in the Long Beach Press Telegram on Sunday using the term “lifestyle” in relation to LGBT people as a rationale for why the Census will not count LGBT people in the 2010 census: “’This is all about the numbers. This is not about lifestyle or anything else,’ says U.S. Census spokeswoman Cynthia Endo.”

The U.S. Census does not explicitly ask respondents if they are LGBT, even though it does count unmarried partners living together and other statistics that could be expanded to include LGBT-specific information.

The lack of inclusion of LGBT people in the Census has long been a source of conflict and controversy: if you don’t acknowledge us, do you even believe we exist? If you don’t count us, do we even matter? We pay taxes, so we obviously exist, but apparently we don’t matter as LGBT people, at least as far as the U.S. Census is concerned.

“Lifestyle” is a term often used by anti gay organizations when they talk about “the gay lifestyle” or “people living that lifestyle.” The implication in this context is always a negative one as if LGBT people choose our orientation or the fact that we live our lives is somehow less worthy than others. Using this term in this context is really only appropriate if you believe being heterosexual is a “lifestyle,” which is, of course, ridiculous. As my friend Joy Silver of RainbowVision Properties says in her promotional materials “It’s not a lifestyle, it’s your life.”

This may sound like a minor offense, but consider the source: when an official of the U.S. government legitimizes the use of this kind of language it gives credibility to the concept.  And regardless of who says it, using the term "lifestyle" in this way points to a much larger problem: minimizing, ignoring or otherwise diminishing our relationships does the same thing to our lives. If we’re not worthy of recognition for who we fully are as citizens and taxpayers, what does that say about our value and worth as humans? 

Language matters and words have power. The sooner we all learn that, the better. I'll volunteer to help by offering to lead a discussion on gay and lesbian communications for government communicators.  If you're interested, you know where to find me.

Anti-Prop. 8 Ads: Too Little, Too Late or Just Right?

As the California Supreme Court hears oral arguments today on the constitutionality of Proposition 8, a debate is growing in our community about the effectiveness of the recent advertising and public outreach conducted by LGBT advocacy organizations in opposition to Proposition 8.

One of the tools generating the most heat is a television commercial produced by Equality California. The ad is simple and straightforward, but some in the community feel it’s not strong enough pointing out that it doesn’t use the words gay or lesbian (or bisexual or transgender for that matter) and it seems too mild to effectively counter the incorrect, harmful charges being leveled by opponents of LGBT equality.

Here’s the ad:

I’m not sure how I feel about this ad, and perhaps that’s the problem. It doesn’t immediately grab me as a "must view" (the way some other ads, produced by others, have in the past), but it doesn’t seem so obviously ineffective as to be a total waste of time. I think my middle of the road reaction means the ad misses the mark.

Can the Washington Post Spell LGBT?

Recent coverage of gay and lesbian topics, people and stories in The Washington Post has generated a fair amount of coverage in LGBT media and on LGBT Web sites and blogs. 

Today’s Post features a solid Style section story on our friend Pam Spaulding of Pam’s House Blend (nice photo, Pam!). This follows an odd front page story last week questioning the sexuality of Hollywood lobbyist Jack Valenti that also used the term “sexual preference” (ugh) and a largely positive story about a local male college student who was elected homecoming queen. And before that there was the Business section story on local businessman David von Storch that apparently omitted several key details of his life. 

New Post editor Marcus Brauchli gave an interview to the Washington Blade earlier this month in which he declared that the Post would be maintain its policy of "not mentioning a subject's sexual orientation in an article unless it's relevant to the story," seeming to indicate that the paper's uneven (at best) coverage would continue. In the past, the Post has repeatedly omitted mentioning the sexuality of prominent LGBT people in its obituary coverage, drawing understandable criticism for seeming to "straightwash" (in Blade editor Kevin Naff's words) individuals in their coverage.

I’m not sure what to think of the Post’s recent coverage. I’ve blogged here before about the importance of understanding what to call us and how to discuss issues related to our community. And many others, including John Aravosis of AMERICAblog, have addressed the Post’s repeated problems in covering our community accurately and respectfully.

While I’m largely encouraged by the Post’s Style section profile coverage (I enjoyed the piece on Pam Spaulding today), the Post’s news coverage seems stuck in some sort of last century limbo: not quite up to date but not so consistently bad as to be worthy of total condemnation. It all makes me wonder if the Post knows how to spell LGBT.

Obviously, how one of this nation’s largest and most influential newspapers covers our community matters a great deal to how we are perceived. But is the current coverage bad, or just uninformed? Would having even more out LGBT reporters in the newsroom than they already have make an appreciable difference in their coverage? What do you think? 

Suze Speaks

As the global economic crisis deepens, financial guru Suze Orman has been receiving even more attention than usual with her advice to consumers about how to weather the economic storm. This weekend, Suze took advantage of that bully pulpit to focus attention on the inequality of the nation’s marriage laws. Specifically signaling out Proposition 8 in California and Proposition 2 in Florida, Orman exhorted her viewers to understand just how unjust these anti-gay initiatives are in financial terms. 

As we’ve blogged before, the decision by public figures to come out and to be vocal can have an enormous impact on how society at large views our community and acts on the issues of concern to us. Suze Orman’s very public coming out in The New York Times and subsequent public statements on Larry King Live and elsewhere have certainly helped raise the visibility of our issues before audiences that might not otherwise be aware of them. 

You might argue that Suze could have and should have been much more vocal much sooner about Proposition 8 and the other state ballot initiatives, particularly given how often she speaks about the benefits of marriage. That’s a valid point, but I think it’s also valid to praise Suze now for so forcefully, and directly, making the case that LGBT rights are human rights by couching them in financial terms that are so easily understood by so many.

I’m still a fan and I’m still hopeful that Suze will continue to leverage her voice and her position to advance issues of importance for all of us. Thanks to AMERICAblog and Towleroad for the tip on Suze’s comments (in the video below).
 

What do you think?  Let us know in the comments below.

The Front Runner 35 Years On: Q&A with Author Patricia Nell Warren

LGBT literature is an often overlooked influencer of opinion and attitudes. Even in an age when we communicate both frequently and instantaneously, the value and significance of a good book should not be underestimated. Literature often shapes who we are and how we perceive our place in the world. And for those of us who came out before the Internet, books were often one of the only tools we had to determine that we were not alone in this world. I can remember reading The Best Little Boy in the World and breathing a huge sigh of relief that there were others out there who felt as I did. Literature matters. 
 
Patricia Nell Warren’s book The Front Runner is a seminal work of gay and lesbian literature. Published thirty five years ago, the book is an examination of sports and homosexuality that still provides much to think about in today’s far more complex world.

In the wake of last week's conversation about Michael Phelps, Matthew Mitcham and homophobia in sports, I was thrilled to be able to put a few questions about sports, literature and our community to Patricia Nell Warren. As you’ll see, Patricia has a lot to say not just about homophobia and sports, but about the state of LGBT literature.

[Patricia Nell Warren photo by Greg Zabilski, courtesy of the author]

Ben Finzel: You wrote The Front Runner in a vastly different era for gay and lesbian people. How much of what the characters experienced is still relevant today, more than 30 years later?

Patricia Nell Warren: In the world of sports, a notable shift of attitude has taken place with the Olympic Games. The IOC now doesn't object to openly LGBT athletes competing -- there were 11 at Athens, and more than 11 (I'm not sure of the exact total) at Beijing. Recently the IOC changed its rules to allow transgendered athletes to compete, providing they meet certain parameters.

But on the U.S. national level, many of the old problems are still there -- especially in team sports, where a closeted athlete can feel the combined homophobic pressures from teammates, coaches, athletic department heads, university presidents, team owners, corporate sponsors, sports bodies, right-wing sports media...and of course the fans. 

What's a Gold Medal Worth?

What’s a gold medal worth? If you’re a straight athlete, apparently quite a bit. If you’re gay, well, not so much. I was reminded of this fact again this week with the news that sponsor magnet and 2008 Olympic gold medalist Michael Phelps has tarnished his image, while sponsor pariah and 2008 Olympic gold medalist Matthew Mitcham has burnished his (to no avail, yet).

As nearly everyone in the universe must know by now, Michael Phelps has this week admitted to acting in a “youthful and inappropriate way” after photos of him engaged in “inappropriate” behavior surfaced in the media. Phelps won eight gold medals in the Beijing Olympics and reaped millions of dollars in additional corporate sponsorship after his record-setting performance there.

Also this week, The Advocate put 2008 gold medalist Matthew Mitcham on its cover (again) and published an interview about his life since his dramatic gold medal performance in the Olympics that, all too briefly, electrified the sporting world. As The Advocate reports, Mitcham was then named Australian 2008 Sports Performer of the Year and Australian GQ’s Sportsman of the Year. And his corporate sponsors? Zero.

In The Advocate article, one of Mitcham’s training partners offers this explanation:

“Coming out may not have been very wise of him,” laments fellow diver Alex Croak, a longtime friend who trains with Mitcham. “I’m not an expert in marketing and don’t know what companies look for, but perhaps it [hurt him] as it is a risk for companies to take.”

A risk for companies to take? Wow. He’s likely right, but I find it remarkable that an athlete who performs at the highest standard of excellence but who is gay is somehow “toxic” while an athlete who also performs at the highest standard of excellence but who is straight is showered with attention and funding. We’re seeing the price of that kind of homophobia now with the backlash to Phelps’ admission of his behavior.

You’d be forgiven for thinking that the lesson here is that you can admit to illegal drug use, but as long as you’re straight, you’ll be forgiven. Conversely, if you’re named Sportsman of the Year but you’re also openly gay, apparently you’re off limits. I'm not trying to pass judgment on Phelps' behavior (the media is already doing that for us), just trying to make a point about perceptions of our community vs. perceptions of the straight community.

This situation won’t change overnight, but the continued performance of openly gay athletes and the resulting media attention that generates (even if “only” in LGBT media) will continue to chip away at the high wall of hypocrisy that exists in sports (check out Steve's post on Martina Navratilova's partnership with AARP, for example). In the meantime, we can continue to admire those individuals who refuse to compromise and who live their lives openly and with no apology.

A Gay Thing Happened on the Way to the Forum…

I recently received an e-mail about Equality Forum 2009, one of the LGBT community’s long-standing events. This year’s forum boasts more than 30 panels, 65 collaborative nonprofit partners and 40 LGBT leaders – all detailed on its newly designed Web site.

After perusing the site (and seriously considering attending), I stepped back and examined the intersection of communication channels and the message their sending to our community and the public at large. First, as trade shows and conferences across the country experience a decrease in glitz and guests attending or cancelation thanks to the economy, Equality Forum’s strong panel line-ups, special events and length speak to its importance and support by the LGBT business and civic community. While largely stereotypical, Equality Forum 2009’s potential of strong attendance and tourism spend in Philadelphia reconfirms the importance of the LGBT dollar in a down or up economy.

Inaugural Invocation Redux: The Next Gay and Lesbian Communications Challenge

If you were fortunate enough to be on the National Mall for the "We Are One" concert yesterday, you may have seen (or, thanks to the size of the crowd, just heard?) the invocation by openly gay bishop Gene Robinson. If you watched the show on HBO (like we did), you missed it. As we hinted in our Twitter feed yesterday, HBO didn't show the invocation on their live broacast. This morning we learned why (thanks to John Aravosis at Americablog): the invocation was delivered ten minutes before the show started and was therefore not part of the "regular" broadcast.

We don't know why this timing was deemed appropriate or the reasoning behind it (particularly after all of the coverage about Robinson's participation and the signal it was supposed to send), but it would appear that once again gay and lesbian visibility has been minimized. And so, we thought it appropriate to break with tradition and post a previous entry again. The text below is from my first post of this new year on Tuesday, January 6, 2009. It seems particularly timely, still. 

The Next Gay and Lesbian Communications Challenge: 

LGBT news, comment and opinion sites and newspapers have been filled for weeks with commentary about the selection of Rick Warren to provide the invocation at President-elect Obama's swearing in this month. Many have asked how a leader presumed to be pro-gay (despite his stance on marriage) could pick an evangelical preacher who has compared gay relationships to incest and pedophilia. Others have wondered why the selection even matters when it's just the invocation that Warren is delivering and not a pronouncement on government policy. 

This decision reminds me of the line often paraphrased from the movie "Cool Hand Luke:" what we have here is a failure to communicate. 

The Next Gay and Lesbian Communications Challenge

LGBT news, comment and opinion sites and newspapers have been filled for weeks with commentary about the selection of Rick Warren to provide the invocation at President-elect Obama’s swearing in this month. Many have asked how a leader presumed to be pro-gay (despite his stance on marriage) could pick an evangelical preacher who has compared gay relationships to incest and pedophilia. Others have wondered why the selection even matters when it’s just the invocation that Warren is delivering and not a pronouncement on government policy. 

This decision reminds me of the line often paraphrased from the movie "Cool Hand Luke:" what we have here is a failure to communicate.

The fact that a largely pro-gay politician (and his presumably pro-gay staff) made this selection and don’t now understand why the selection was so bad speaks volumes about the power and peril of gay and lesbian communications today. 

In a year in which gay and lesbian people earned the right to equal marriage in two states (California and Connecticut), more gay and lesbian actors and other public influencers came out (and fewer people cared) and companies large and small did even more to reach gay and lesbian consumers, its tempting to think it strange that political leaders might be so off in their calculus.

But maybe it isn’t. Society often leads politics. Corporate America is often ahead of the American government in recognizing the value and worth of citizens and consumers (witness the high numbers of companies now scoring 100 on the HRC Corporate Equality Index, for example). Community leaders and community organizers on the ground are often much more aware of the realities of our lives than the political leaders that purport to serve us.

How ironic then that the first “community organizer” in generations to win the presidency could be so out of touch on such a fundamental community issue even before he gets to the White House.

Why does all of this matter? Because what we say, how it is said and who among us says it has the power to influence millions of people. By conferring legitimacy on incorrect, hateful comments about LGBT people, the Obama team has highlighted the fact that there is still much work to be done on both communications and education.

What’s the answer?  How do we get past the “failure” communicate? In short, keep going.

The LGBT community must continue to talk about these topics, explain what they mean, and demonstrate by the power of our lives, what the difference is between a “difference of opinion” and an opinion that makes a damaging difference.

The business community and other influencers already engaged with the LGBT community must continue to be engaged and to leverage the power of their actions as an example for others to follow.

The elected officials, community organizers and public at large must continue to listen and be open to learning more about who we are and why equality is more than just an abstract concept subject to “differences of opinion.”

To me, this is the next great gay and lesbian communications challenge. Let’s hope this is the year that events, actions and opportunities conspire to bring us together to talk, listen and learn.  Then, perhaps we will begin to address it. 

Praise for A Day Without a Gay

When I called in sick to work on Wednesday two weeks ago with a fever, a handful of my colleagues e-mailed me articles about calling in "gay" for  A Day Without  A Gay. Although I had accepted an invitation to participate on Facebook, I was not really planning on ditching work and protesting. Apparently, I was not the only one on the sidelines as the AP reports that only few were actually willing to protest.

A Day Without A Gay was inspired by independent movie A Day Without A Mexican. In the latter, Californians wake up one day to find millions of Mexican immigrants have disappeared. The impact on the day to day status of the state is immense, with businesses falling apart, trash accumulating to create unsanitary conditions, etc. The creators of A Day Without a Gay liked the idea of showcasing the gay community this way as well simply because many don't realize the large number of people who make up our community, and protest anti-gay marriage laws.
 
Many critics have commented on the economic timing of the protest and claim that people are less likely to risk their jobs when there are no other jobs for them. The creators of the protest saw the poor state of the economy as an advantage in which gays and lesbians would have a larger economic impact.

Were the number of people who protested large enough to make a difference? Or were they too small to make an impact and be laughed at instead? Did we really affect change?

I consider the viral aspect of the communications campaign of  A Day Without A Gay. It used viral marketing tactics to promote and generate support. It caught the attention of media giant CNN and local California and national bloggers. It formed partnerships with grassroots organizations who collaborated to assign December 10 as The Day Without Gays. All in all, a success when you consider its viral, grassroots and social media tactics, but as my colleague Bryan mentions, it lacked campaign focus. 

So why the harsh criticism? I think it's just poor timing for two main reasons: one being the economy and the fears that come with it, and the other is the holiday time frame. People shop more than ever during this time of the year. Do you agree? Did you chose to or not to participate in this cause? 
 

The Media and the Closet

We’ve written a great deal here about the way in which the media covers issues related to the sexual orientation of famous actors, television personalities and politicians. There’s been a real trend in the past few years of more, and more intense, media coverage of the lives of people purported/assumed to be gay. And so it was with great interest that I read an advocate.com story last night referring to the late Van Johnson as a “gay heartthrob.”

I’m a fan of old movies (just ask me to quote lines from “Singin’ in the Rain” or to talk about the fabulous Katherine Hepburn and Lauren Bacall) and I was sad to see the headlines this weekend about the death of Van Johnson at the age of 92. But I was taken aback to see The Advocate so casually refer to an icon of “old” Hollywood as a gay man.  Did I miss that memo? I’ve never heard that before about Johnson. It’s not as though I’m not aware of the rumors about many famous or public figures (in Hollywood, in New York, in Washington and beyond), but this one slipped right by me. I guess I’ll have to brush up on my TCM movie watching or give Netflix a try.

Whether or not I’m out of touch on the sexuality of Hollywood legends, the story brings up a larger point.  Is it okay for media to openly declare, or assume, the sexuality of famous/public people? We’ve seen it a great deal in the past few years, after the deaths of Merv Griffin, Susan Sontag and others. But it seems that the media is becoming much more willing to assume the sexuality of someone, whether or not that person has ever publicly disclosed his or her orientation. 

And this is happening with people who are still very much alive, as well. A case in point is Florida Governor Charlie Crist. Rumors of his sexual orientation have floated around gay media and the Internet for years. With his wedding to a woman this weekend a topic of conversation in gay media for the past several months, many outlets have been directly referring to the Governor as a gay man even though he has denied he is gay on several occasions.

Although this phenomenon is largely limited to gay media and online outlets for now, it won’t always be. The role the Internet plays as a great equalizer of information means that this type of conversation will be conducted in so-called “mainstream” media as well (and indeed already has, at least in the case of Mr. Griffin). That brings up all kinds of issues of free speech, privacy and the role of communicators in addressing all aspects of our lives.

What do you think? Is it okay to make these kinds of public assumptions or should media wait for confirmation or proof before openly declaring the sexuality of famous or public figures?

Calling In with Mixed Messages

“Sorry, boss. I won’t be making it in today. I’m gay.”

Yesterday across the country, gays and lesbians were encouraged to deliver the line above to employers as part of “Day Without a Gay," a national “grassWeb” effort for LGBT individuals to again make a statement against the recent passing of anti-gay legislation in Florida, California, Arkansas and Arizona. What started as a creative idea by Sean Heatherington and his partner to show LGBT individuals’ contributions to society by leaving the workforce for a day and volunteering that time to volunteerism, quickly grew into additional components including protests and shopping boycotts enacted by a growing sector of new advocates.

We’ve watched and posted frequently here on the communications surrounding the election and passage of Proposition 8, debates on the No on Prop 8 campaign effectiveness and resulting advocacy efforts. “Day Without a Gay” was no exception – I waited to read the news coverage this morning to see if “Day Without a Gay” had a large effect. Following are some clips from major media: Associated Press, San Francisco Chronicle, Reuters and the San Jose Mercury News.

Transgender Day of Remembrance

Today is the Annual Transgender Day of Remembrance. In honor of this occasion, we thought we'd share a few links to other blogs and Web sites we read that are featuring posts and other information about transgender people and the day itself. As we say so often, communications breeds understanding and we hope that sharing information about transgender people and their lives will help support broader understanding and engagement. 

• Transgender Day of Remembrance site

• Pam's House Blend blog 
• HRC Back Story blog 
• GLAAD's Resource Kit for Journalists 
• PFLAG National Blog 
• Mombian

If you have other stories or links to share, please feel free to comment below.

Six Degrees of Out

Of late, a number of celebrities have publicly outed themselves as lesbian or gay. Some were slightly surprising or slightly anticipated while others were a major yawn to everyone most people. Still, others were notable yet barely a blip on the public radar.

And other celebrities are firmly entrenched in a gray area of the glass closet or straddling the fence publicly.

The latter case of Lindsey Lohan is the issue I recently re-read an Afterelton post about how media can or should cover celebrities leading gay or lesbian lives, aka “When is Out Actually "Out" When it Comes to Covering Gay Celebrities?” from September.  Of late, mainstream and even LGBT media pair Lohan with DJ Samantha Ronson as a “gal pal” with a wink. Most recently I’ve seen less ambiguous labeling in coverage of a PETA protestor flouring fur-clad Lohan as she entered a Paris event with “girlfriend” Ronson.

Chicago Replaces Ft. Lauderdale Among Top Five Gay Travel Cities

It was interesting to see the results recently announced about most-visited cities in the U.S. for domestic gay and lesbian travel. The list from Community Marketing Inc. was topped, as it was last year, by New York followed by Las Vegas, San Francisco and Los Angeles/West Hollywood. Being a Chicagoan, I of course noted that the Windy City moved from the No. 7 spot to the No. 5 slot once occupied by Ft. Lauderdale.

Chicago has long been considered an undiscovered jewel for gay and lesbian travelers. And possibly our hosting the 2006 Gay Games helped open the eyes of some gay and lesbian travelers to the wealth of sporting, entertainment and cultural attractions here when they were making travel plans in the past year.

Chicago has long been a leading destination for business events, and once again it topped the ranking of gay and lesbian cities for business travel. For visitors coming to Chicago, the motto holds true that ‘seeing is believing.’ The city becomes magical to anyone who has experienced the miles of beaches, lakefront parks and biking trails or the shopping and nightlife of Boystown with its rainbow pylon markers. Even the cold months don’t slow down the city events or travelers who find great winter deals on airfare and hotels here.

Family of Choice - More Q&A with RainbowVision Properties President and CEO Joy Silver

Yesterday, we began a fascinating conversation with Joy Silver, president of RainbowVision Properties, about the LGBT community and aging. Today, we conclude that conversation with a look at messaging and trends. 

Ben Finzel: What messaging do you think is most effective with our community? How do you talk about aging and the need to prepare for the future with an audience that doesn't always want to think about tomorrow? 

Joy Silver: We have always known that we need to take care of ourselves. Ensuring our elder years is the most important aspect of our lives. This tells us that aging has to be contextualized differently, and that the elements involved in aging challenges may require a new perspective. The new perspective might then rely on the power of personal decision-making, prevention, and the redefinition of aging itself. We need more progressive images of all of our life stages in all of GLBT media. We need more stories, we need more models and visual images, we need more news and information. Much like the mainstream media we seem to want images of those so much younger than our actual age. But the mainstream population has more options to help guide them smoothly in to senior years. Many of their own lives are intergenerational, there are roles defined like grandmother or Chairman of the Board. There is a sense of belonging regardless of age. If we feel important to the community, if we have a good family of choice, if we have great role models then we will feel more comfortable in our skins. Just look at what AARP The Magazine is doing to enhance the wonderful concept of adult years. We GLBT people now have some terrific role models, sensational stories and successful lives. 

Family of Choice: Q&A with RainbowVision Properties President and CEO Joy Silver

We’ve blogged about gayby boomers and gay aging issues quite a few times lately. Recent stories in Newsweek and The New York Times have helped to boost interest and engagement in important questions about how we deal with aging and related issues in our community and what resources there are for us now and in the future. This is a topic of particular interest to me, and I thought I’d use this opportunity to go back to our friend (and former client) Joy Silver of RainbowVision Properties to get a new perspective on this always-significant communications issue.

As we get ready for the Thanksgiving holiday, I found Joy’s thoughts about creating a Family of Choice really interesting – isn’t that we do in our daily lives, to some extent?  Joy’s insight and experience is not only interesting, but immensely helpful to anyone thinking about communicating to gayby boomers and their older counterparts.

What follows is Part One of our two-part conversation with Joy. Today’s conversation focuses on the evolution of RainbowVision’s business and the challenges of communicating on aging issues. Tomorrow, we’ll take a look at messaging and future trends. 

Ben Finzel: Your property in Santa Fe has been open for a few years now. How is it going? What has surprised you about how your business has evolved in the past few years?

Joy Silver: We officially opened in June of 2006 in Santa Fe NM, with ribbon cutting that included elected officials like Gov. Bill Richardson, and Santa Fe Mayor David Coss.  Interestingly, the Santa Fe GLBT community has shown interest in having their blood relatives and loved ones live with us in The Castro, which is our Assisted Living. What surprises other people, although we expected this to be true, is the range of ages our members make up. The youngest is 44 and the oldest is 96. We see our population doing great advance planning for their futures - we get requests for information from people in their 30’s and 40’s. RainbowVision Santa Fe is an open and inclusive GLBT- majority community. We do encourage our allies to consider us as we believe a diverse community is the most interesting. We are a living laboratory, and our community members serve as an onsite focus group. We have benefited from the input of our members as to all aspects of living: wellness, physical fitness, dining, and events. What we have learned, and continue to learn, will be incorporated into our future communities as well.

What to Say Next...

I can’t stop talking about it. It was everywhere this weekend – in the news, on YouTube, in the streets of San Diego, Los Angeles and Chicago, and in conversations across America’s dining tables. Proposition 8 isn’t leaving the communications limelight anytime soon. In light of its passing, LGBT activists and allies have risen in greater and more vocal demonstrations, while the media continues to analyze and assess the campaigns’ effect on the outcome. As with Ben and Ivette, my thoughts are continually jumping back and forth between the communication effectiveness and engagements with African-Americans, youth and others.

As we continue to follow this expanding coverage and surrounding gay and lesbian communications issues here at FH Out Front, I found this video of panelists from Anderson Cooper’s CNN show helpful. It touches on a number of the audience segments and issues in communication. Similarly, this article from CNN also offers additional fodder and links to the continuing conversation. 

Did You Know?

October marks the celebration of 31 icons as part of the Equality Forum’s “GLBT History Month.” I’ll admit I didn’t know we had a month—but I am definitely going to register at Target to celebrate!

Check out Equality Forum’s Web site which lists the icons recognized each day of this month. Some personal favorites:
• Stephen Sondheim: I am a musical theatre groupie, and Sondheim is a master of the beautiful dance between words and lyrics.
• Alice Walker: The Color Purple is an amazing book, and an amazing movie. Walker’s ability to understand women, and the dynamic of women falling in love and appreciating each other, is unparalleled.
• Tony Kushner: Angels in America. Enough said.
• Rosie O’Donnell: Love her. Love her opinion, love her confidence, love her compassion for children and our community. Mostly, love that she put the women of “The View” in their place.

And today’s icon? Philip Johnson. He’s a Cleveland native (all the good gays are…), and an astounding architect, creating such visual works of art as the 648-foot AT&T/Sony skyscraper in New York City and the Cathedral of Hope in Dallas, which is the largest gay inclusive church in the nation, with 3,000 regular worshippers. The Cathedral was described by Johnson as his crown jewel, because it sent a startling visual message that “all gay people are children of God, too.” Johnson came out later in his life, spending most of his life with his partner of 45-years, David Whitney. He died in January 2005.

These icons have helped our community in many ways, but mostly, their noteworthy contributions to society have helped others see us in a positive, substantive light. Many of the icons, including Sondheim and Kushner, communicate through their work, and in turn, spread awareness and appreciation for all of our contributions. Their spotlight helps us reach and impact audiences all around the world.

So, happy GLBT History month to us all. I’m proud of our history, but even more proud of the history we continue to make. To those of you who are pioneers in your field, and to those of you who everyday make a difference in someone’s life, thank you. 

My contribution to GLBT History month? A pilgrimage to Miami Beach next week to see one of my icons on stage—Tina Turner. I’ll take photos of me and Ms. Tina for those interested…

Who is your icon? Let us know in the comments section below.

Are We There Yet? - The New Normal, Part Two

Earlier this month, I was the guest speaker at the regular Thursday breakfast meeting of PEN, the local gay and lesbian chamber of commerce. I talked about the power of gay and lesbian communications and my thoughts about what I do and how it’s relevant to gay and lesbian business people. During the Q&A, one of the organization’s leaders asked an interesting question: are we now so mainstream that we’re accepted and we don’t have to worry as much about being seen as the “other?” 

The question made me think of the "New Normal" post I wrote last spring contrasting the wedding on the ABC TV hit "Brothers and Sisters" with a local “news” story about ex-gays. My conclusion then (and at the breakfast this month) was this: we have a longer road to travel. We’re not there yet.

Sadly, this month has brought fresh, and much more troubling, evidence of this assertion. In DC, a gay man was savagely beaten outside a gay club earlier this month. He later died in a hospital. Just up I-95 in Baltimore, a gay man walking home with his partner last week was savagely beaten and is now in a hospital, reportedly in critical condition. 

And these are just the most recent examples. They’re the ones we know about. There are likely many more stories like this in other communities across the country.

Yes, despite the fact that Ellen is now the face of Cover Girl and her wedding received a splashy (and straightforward, if you will) cover story in People magazine, we’re not there yet. 

Designing Your Destiny

Recently my colleagues Michael Murphy and Ivette Lopez posted on HIV communications and HIV testing awareness, for the public at large and the Hispanic LGBT population. While communications is an essential component for educating and maintaining the spread of the virus, it plays a completely different yet equally vital role for those living with HIV and the associated stigmas. With a 2006 Center for Disease Control study reporting that more than 440,000 people are infected with HIV in the United States, many individuals daily must combat personal and professional stigmas with few organizations and resources available to them, and even fewer HIV-positive role models.

I recently saw through our friends at Queerty that former Project Runway contestant Jack Mackenroth, who we’ve covered here before, has developed Living Positive By Design, a national HIV and AIDS education campaign that is partnering with local HIV/AIDS organizations across the country. Having lived with HIV for nearly 20 years, Jack Mackenroth quickly rose to be a leading HIV-positive public figure though his appearance on Project Runway, where he openly discussed his positive status and his personal management of the disease.

So just how do Jack and Living Positive By Design intend to make progress for those living with HIV and AIDS? Thoughtful conversation. He is planning to speak about his “experiences living with HIV for nearly 20 years, addressing the stigma still associated with the disease and highlighting the importance for people living with HIV to have a positive outlook on life while effectively managing their disease.”

Living Positive By Design will kick off this Saturday, Sept. 20 in Ft. Lauderdale at the 2008 United States Conference on AIDS (USCA), which is sponsored by the National Minority AIDS Council (NMAC). The campaign will make subsequent stops over the next few months in  Houston, New York, San Francisco and Atlanta. For more details and video from Jack, visit the Living Positive By Design MySpace page.

Thoughtful conversations and open dialogues – the power of communication is a necessity in the efforts to educate others about HIV and testing, while simultaneously championing those already living with the virus ability to manage their disease and be a normal, productive member of society. This same belief in communications as a change agent is what drives our work for our clients and the Out Front Blog. We look forward to seeing the results of Jack’s efforts, as he continues to use his life to educate and communicate for those living and managing HIV like him.

School Pride: A Freshman's Perspective

By now, most children have returned to school for academic endeavors and life experiences that many will look back on as “the best years of their lives.” But for lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender and questioning (LGBTQ) students, the upcoming semesters may be more filled with anxiety and harassment. Earlier this year, my colleague Laura Nguyen addressed the fatal shooting of Lawrence King in a post about coming out and the workplace King’s death is a reminder that some school hallways are not safe havens of study and collegiate interaction for all students.

As the young “freshman” of the Out Front blogging team, I perked up when reading Amy Wooten’s recent article in the Windy City Times about Chicago’s proposed LGBTQ and allies school. How great would it have been to study Latin or partake in physical education in an environment that was supportive? More smiles and greetings in the hallways instead of glares and shoves? While I am aware of the Harvey Milk school in New York City that supports an inclusive, safe learning environment for gay, lesbian and bisexual students, having a similar school in Chicago’s own backyard brings greater examination of the LGBTQA school concept – and how our community communicates about this issue with local government agencies, the business community and amongst ourselves.

The Pride Campus high school as proposed by the Greater Lawndale Little Village School for Social Justice would offer Chicagoland’s gay and questioning youth and their student allies college preparatory courses in a safe, non-violent atmosphere. With the final decision on the proposal in October and a community hearing scheduled for this Thursday at the Center on Halsted, Pride Campus’ supporters have already began speaking out and citing safety statistics in support of the concept.

In 2003, a Chicago Public School District survey noted that gay and lesbian students are three times more likely to miss school than their straight peers because they feel unsafe. Similar studies by the Gay, Lesbian and Straight Education Network offer more perspective:

• A study from 2006 reported that 35 percent of Illinois students said sexual orientation was the most common grounds for bullying, while almost 75 percent of those students have heard anti-gay remarks from classmates at their school.
• A 2008 survey of school principals found only 33 percent of secondary school principals reported a lesbian or gay student would feel safe at their school, as compared to 64 percent of students from religious minority groups and 76 percent of minority racial students.

Even with these numbers and favorable support from Chicago Public School and LGBT community leaders, the voluntary Pride Campus concept has also received opposition from inside and outside the gay community. Counterarguments from LGBT leaders and local conservative organizations cite segregation and misuse of publics funds.

However Chicago Public School’s administrators and school board decide in October on Pride Campus, the road ahead will require open communication between teachers, administrators, students, and the community at large about the purpose and benefits of an LGBT-specific campus. In the meantime, what are your thoughts on LGBT-specific schools? You can read more about Pride Campus here and let us know your opinion in the comments below.

Mitchell Gold Tells Our Stories

I recently received an invitation to a book signing and reception for a new book edited by Mitchell Gold (of Mitchell Gold + Bob Williams) about the struggles of "growing up gay in America."  The book is called "CRISIS: 40 Stories Revealing the Personal, Social, and Religious Pain and Trauma of Growing Up Gay in America." I haven't heard much about the book yet, but I was impressed to see that Mitchell Gold is expanding on his already extensive efforts to engage in the community by editing a book focused on telling the stories of our lives.

We've written a lot about corporate engagement on this blog (particularly lately) and yesterday Laura reminded us that words can hurt. I'm usually impressed when business leaders take an active (and genuine) interest in our community and Mitchell Gold strikes me as a solid example of a business leader who really understands the power of engagement and the impact of negative and harmful words and actions that too many of us have suffered in our lives. Of course, Mitchell is gay so his involvement in our community is personal. But I don't think that makes his actions any less powerful. Frankly, he should be involved in our community and the fact that he is speaks volumes about all of those openly gay (and not so openly gay) business leaders who are not and who profit from us but do little or nothing to help our community. 

Granted, storytelling is but one facet of communications, but it is an often overlooked tool. The personal stories of people we recognize and admire are often much more resonant with the public than one more press release about this or that program. When we humanize LGBT people's lives, we make connections with others and we put our experiences in a context that others can understand. 

The book features a foreword by Martina Navratilova and stories by Congresswoman Tammy Baldwin and Congressman Barney Frank, actors Richard Chamberlain and Alec Mapa, LGBT community leaders Neil Giuliano, Jody Huckaby, Kevin Jennings and Joe Solmonese and religious leaders Bishop Gene Robinson and Mel White among many other dynamic and interesting individuals (although it seems heavily weighted toward men's stories). I haven't seen the book yet, but I'm already intrigued. I hope it's as good as it sounds and I hope it adds to the often underreported conversation about our lives.

News and Notes

Here’s a quick summary of information we’ve received from our friends in the blogosphere about relevant news coverage and new blog series. We hope you’ll check them out for the latest and greatest on gay and lesbian communications:

• Our friend Dana Rudolph at Mombian let us know about an Entrepreneur story on marketing same-sex weddings that was recently picked up by msnbc.com. As Dana said to us, it’s nice to see stories like this getting picked up in so-called “mainstream” outlets.

• Our friend Nina Smith at Queercents sent us an announcement about a new series they’ve launched called “How to Stretch Your Food Dollar.’ It’s an informative (and helpful) look at creative ways to eat well on a budget.

• Our new friend Jacque Wing at The Trevor Project gave us a heads-up (after reading Eddy's post on the organization) on a new program the Project is launching this year to combat LGBTQ youth suicide. We’ll have more on this program in the coming weeks, but for now check it out on their Web site.

Do you have other relevant gay and lesbian communications news? Let us know and we may feature it here in the future.

No Wedding Rings for Hyatt?

As same sex marriages continue in California, all eyes are now on the amendment on the November ballot in California that seeks to overturn the state supreme court ruling that legalized the marriages a mere two months ago. Media coverage has turned from images of happy couples celebrating their unions to speculation about the fate of the amendment (the latest polls show a majority opposed to the amendment) and profiles of the leaders on both sides of the debate. Predictably, funding for and against the amendment has also received a fair amount of attention. As the Washington Blade reported yesterday, it’s that last point that has caused the latest round of controversy.

According to the Blade article, the owner of a Hyatt hotel in San Diego has given $125,000 to an organization that supports the amendment. That would not ordinarily be news if not for the fact that the Global Hyatt Corporation (owners of the brand, but not every individual hotel that carries the brand name) is widely known for its engagement with the gay and lesbian community including sponsorship of a Pride program with GLAAD and a national advertising campaign that we (and others) have cited for its gay-positive and appropriate tone and messaging. According to the Blade article, gay rights advocates have labeled the San Diego situation the “Hyatt of Hypocrisy” and are picketing the Manchester Grand Hyatt in San Diego which is owned by Doug Manchester.

A Hyatt corporate spokesperson was quoted in the Blade article as saying that it’s a “personal decision of Mr. Manchester that doesn’t involve Hyatt” and “his name is on the door, but it’s not the views of Hyatt.” Pretty mild commentary given the starkly drawn lines this situation paints.

Although it’s a tough situation – what do you do when a franchisee supports a message contrary to your corporate position? – the answer should not be difficult to determine. Hyatt needs to pick a side and stick with it. As we’ve said many times before, the challenge for corporate communicators in situations like these is to be consistent in your commitment. If Hyatt believes what it says about its commitment to engagement with our community (and I believe it does), it needs to draw a stronger point of differentiation between the corporation and one of the owners of a property that carries its brand. While Hyatt can’t control what an individual hotel owner may choose to do or say, it can (and should) try to control its brand and the ways in which it is perceived. 

My advice? Hyatt should unequivocally restate its commitment to engagement with and support for the gay and lesbian community and clearly and definitively explain that the views of individual owners are not the views of the corporation. By “uncoupling” the views of an owner from those of the company, Hyatt can begin to repair some of the damage that has been done to its reputation. Consumers don’t often make distinctions between the brand and individual hotels, so it will be even more important for Hyatt to make those distinctions clear and consistently communicate what Hyatt’s values are and why they are consistent with its past actions and its future plans.

What do you think?  Any other advice for Hyatt in this situation?

Has Marriage Eclipsed Pride?

I missed DC Pride 2008, so perhaps my perspective is a bit skewed, but Pride Month across the country seems muted this year. Locally, we’ve had the street festivals, parades and other events, and there have been the requisite pictures of shirtless men in the local newspaper, but something’s different. There just doesn’t seem to be the excitement and engagement in Pride this year that I’ve felt in years past.

Has media coverage and attention to California’s legalization of same-sex marriage taken up all of the public’s attention (even ours)? Have photos of beaming couples exchanging their vows and endless stories about George Takei’s impending nuptials so occupied our attention that there’s nothing left for the multiple Pride celebrations taking place across the country?

I think the answer to these questions is yes, at least to a certain degree. There is generally only “space” in the media for one gay-focused story at a time, and the compelling storyline of thousands of gay and lesbian couples getting married is generally more interesting than “another” Pride parade.

As much as I love Pride (and agree with the points Laura made in her post yesterday), I don’t think this turn of events is a bad thing. The media coverage about the advent of same sex marriage in California has been largely positive and definitely helped demonstrate the power of equality and the worth of our lives. In many cases, Pride month is an “excuse” for media to focus on our lives and our impact on society (if only media did that year-round) and the timing of the California marriage decision played nicely into this annual interest in “gay” stories.

With Pride Month wrapping up next week, I think the meaning of Pride is as important as it ever was, even if it’s being communicated in a different way. The LGBT community is a powerful, vibrant part of society. Reminders that we are, in many ways, “just like everyone else” and deserving of the same rights and responsibilities as “everyone else” can only help advance our community’s broader goals. 

My conclusion? Even with a “muted” Pride this year, the power of communications to affect change is alive and well. If a picture is worth a thousand words, the photos of happy couples celebrating a moment in their lives many thought might never come are communicating tens of thousands of positive messages about who we are and why our lives matter. And that is something to be proud of indeed.

How-To: Market Marriage in California - Got To Be Real

Today’s the day. Same sex marriage is now legal in the state of California. Finally sensing a golden (state) opportunity, marketers and service industry professionals are clogging inboxes around the country promoting their interest in helping gays and lesbians conduct and/or celebrate their weddings (I received several emails yesterday and several more last week).

And why not? Last week, the Williams Institute at UCLA’s School of Law issued a report estimating that as many as one-half of California’s 100,000+ same sex couples (and 68,000 from other states) would marry in California in the next three years bringing more than $60 million to the state’s budget and nearly $700 million to the state’s wedding-related industry.

For those of who remember the days (not so long ago) when civil unions were considered both cutting-edge and controversial, this is a remarkable turn of events. It seems that there is nothing like the promise of green to make pink and purple seem legitimate to a broader group of people.

Don’t get me wrong: I think all of this attention and possibility for outreach is great. The challenge remains, however, for all of the folks seeking to cash in on this opportunity to be genuine and “real” in their approach. For every Kimpton and San Francisco Convention and Visitors Bureau that has been conducting outreach to our community for years, there are dozens of other brands, companies and cities/counties who are now realizing for the first time that we are a wonderful target market they should target now that gay marriage is legal.

The potential exists for a lot of well-meaning, but potentially off-base (or worse), communications and outreach in the coming months. For folks new to our market or just unsure how best to communicate in these changing times, there are several rules of the road to observe. As with many things in our community, they all center on the idea that – as Cheryl Lynn once sang  – you’ve “got to be real.”

Ellen: Speaking Truth to Power

In my first post on this blog, I talked about the power of gay and lesbian communications to effect social change. My point was that outreach to our community would lead to social change. We’ve seen many examples to prove my point in the 18 months since I wrote that post. In his post last week, Eddy made the point that the reverse is true as well. He blogged about how the legalization of marriage for gays and lesbians in California would likely lead to a gay and lesbian outreach boom designed to capitalize on the ruling.

In either case, one thing is clear: gay and lesbian communications has the power to positively impact the world we live in and helps increase understanding and acceptance of our community by the heterosexual majority.

In the wake of the California ruling and the ensuing coverage, openly lesbian talk show host Ellen Degeneres gave us perhaps the most dramatic social media example of this point. In a conversation with presidential candidate John McCain that aired on her show last week, Ellen pressed the presumptive Republican nominee on gay marriage. If you haven’t seen the video, check it out below: it’s one of the most awkward, uncomfortable conversations in recent television history.

By addressing the issue as one of basic fairness in a tone and style that was more common sense than confrontational, Ellen probably did more to “normalize” the marriage discussion among the “everyday” people who watch her show than any other single act.  To me, it was a communications masterstroke and an excellent example of speaking truth to power.

We’ve had discussions on this blog before about whether or not Ellen has done enough to merit the high rankings she’s achieved in terms of her perceived “power” in our community.  My point today is not to rehash those arguments or engage in a dialogue about what she should or shouldn’t have done in the past. I mean only to highlight an example of how to leverage one of our most powerful communications media (television) to have a real impact. I’ve been impressed by the way Ellen has so matter-of-factly woven the truth of her life into the conversations she has conducted recently on her show. It may seem simple, but there is power in simplicity and Ellen has begun to demonstrate that on her show.

According to Pam’s House Blend and others, Ellen followed her McCain conversation by asking First Lady Laura Bush and First Daughter Jenna Bush for permission to use the family’s Crawford, Texas ranch for Ellen’s upcoming wedding to actress Portia DeRossi.  Jenna reportedly said “sure” and offered Ellen advice on how and where to hold a marriage ceremony (the interview will air on the show tomorrow). Well, how “normal” is that? And that’s the point, the more we talk about our lives honestly and openly, the more difficult we make it for anti-gay zealots to paint us as “others.” And for me, that’s reason enough to keep promoting the importance of gay and lesbian communications and outreach.

The New Normal? Not Quite

After watching Kevin’s marriage proposal to Scotty and Saul's coming out statement to Kevin on the fantastic ABC hit show Brothers and Sisters on Sunday, you’d be forgiven for thinking “gay is the new normal.” The proposal and coming out statement, and the way the writers blended both stories into the plot as matter-of-factly as any other element, spoke volumes about the way Hollywood (or at least ABC) has begun to evolve. It was wonderful television because it was so, well, normal.

The thrill was short-lived, however. Viewers in Washington, D.C. were startled out of any pro-gay reverie they may have been experiencing by a teaser for yesterday’s 5pm newscast on the ABC affiliate that broadcasts Brothers and Sisters. The teaser promised a look at the question of whether gays and lesbians can “change” their “sexual preference.” The story, which trod the same well-worn, tired path of so many local news stories before it, used terms like “gay lifestyle” and “militant gays” to make the point that there is a “controversy” about whether or not you can “choose to be gay.”

Sigh.

One step forward, two steps back. 

National Day of Silence

Communication is often about noise: talking, laughing, singing. But silence often communicates volumes. Today is the 12th National Day of Silence, a project of the Gay, Lesbian and Straight Education Network (GLSEN) to "bring attention to anti-LGBT name-calling, bullying and harassment in schools."

This year's observance honors Lawrence King, the California 8th-grader killed by a fellow student because of his sexual orientation and gender expression (click here to read Laura's Out Front Blog post that references King's story).

According to GLSEN, "hundreds of thousands of students will come together on April 25 to encourage schools and classmates to address the problem of anti-LGBT behavior." Visit the Day of Silence Web site to learn more about the day, view a public service announcement from Lance Bass, and read the Day of Silence blog.

Please share this blog post with your friends and family (or just forward them the link to the Day of Silence site) and do what you can to help "end the silence."   

Out's Power List is Out

Out has this week issued its second annual Power 50 list of the “most influential gays and lesbians in America.”  I’m always interested in these kinds of lists because I’m fascinated by who media thinks is influential and why. 

This year’s list is sure to spark controversy with its prominent inclusion of notable individuals who have not publicly said whether or not they are LGBT. In that category this year are Anderson Cooper (at No. 3) and Jodie Foster (at No. 13). Eddy has blogged on them in the past and tackled the tough issue of what non-communication about a person’s sexual orientation means or should mean. 

For the purposes of Out’s list, I suppose the point is that whether these individuals are “out” or not is beside the point: they’re perceived to be LGBT and they exert a lot of influence, ergo they should be listed on an accounting of the “most powerful.”  What do you think?  It’s a tough question that goes to the heart of how we communicate, what we say and why that is important.

By the way, I was really curious to see a few other folks we’ve blogged about show up on the list as well: Scott Rudin was ranked No. 11, Suze Orman came in at No. 24, Tim Gunn was ranked at No. 28, Randy Lovely hit No. 35, and Martina Navratilova landed at No. 46.

Communications Resources Around the Web

We receive a steady stream of emails updating us on events, activities and feature stories on various Web sites. We also get notes from our blogger friends about new series and features on their blogs. We thought we'd share a few of our favorites with you today to give you some insight into what we find most interesting and relevant to advancing the conversation about gay and lesbian communications:

• Dana Rudolph of Mombian regularly features information and resources of value to lesbian moms (and to all gay parents, really). If you're wondering how best to communicate with gay parents as an audience, visit Mombian to learn more about what motivates gay parents and the issues they care about. Check out her most recent "LGBT Parenting Roundup" for background on the latest developments across the country affecting LGBT parents.
• Joe LaMuraglia of GayWheels.com needs no introduction to regular Advocate readers who have noticed the regular auto review features Joe and his team have been writing. Gaywheels.com covers the auto industry like no one else in our community and provides information about the auto industry leaders doing the most to reach our community. Check out their regularly updated list of top 10 researched vehicles to gain an understanding of the cars our community is most interested in.
• Nina Smith and the team at Queercents focus on finance, accounting and personal budgeting for LGBT people (I love their site tagline: "We're Here, We're Queer and We're Not Going Shopping without Coupons"). Reading their posts gives you a great sense of how to communicate with our community about money and financial issues and just what we care about the most when it comes to our wallets and pocketbooks. And don't miss their ongoing 10 Money Questions series which features insightful interviews with well-known gay people about their views on money: the newest interview with Mariah Hanson (founder of The Dinah) is really interesting.
• Michael Lamb's Echelon Magazine bills itself as "the source for GLBT business professionals" and features news and information about business communications efforts relevant to our community. They're a good resource for the latest news on business initiatives, consumer and other survey results and related activities. Check out their recent story on the Air New Zealand "Pink Flight" if you're interested in the latest on this marketing effort that we covered extensively last fall. 

Note that you can visit these sites and blogs anytime by clicking on the links to the left. If you visit any of our friends, come back and let us know what you think. And please let us know your favorites, particularly if they include sites that we don't list: we're always interested in learning about additional LGBT communications resources on the Web.